I am TERRIFIED of being alone...truly terrified! I would do anything to be connected with someone who can keep me anchored. I too have lost so much, because of my illness, and the longevity of it (17 years) There is no going back to reclaim it, it is gone forever. But I do have faith that God may yet bring joy to my heart, and relief to my spirit. He has done it before, and I trust Him. The hardest part is the intense longing to be with God physically...an end to the horrible aloneness, and the suffering. He has made it clear that I must keep on keeping on...I hope that you can do this too!