I've been doing really well today, but a couple hours ago I started to feel strange, surreal, having weird depressive thoughts (like that no one in my family matters because we're all going to die in the end anyway, WTF?). Now I'm feeling very irritable and overwhelmed. I got short with my 4 year old and told her "I just need a break!" then I just stood there and stared at her for a long time. She was confused and upset. I felt terrible, but I was paralyzed, couldn't even talk, I could only stare at her. After a while, I called my husband to come entertain her for a while so I could get some space. I feel okay now that I'm alone, but I cannot handle having anyone near me. I don't know WTF is wrong with me right now. Maybe the stimulation from the party earlier is catching up with me. I feel guilty for being weird and upsetting my daughter.