I haven't posted in a while in this forum, my current battle is fought along side with my T. I truley love my T in more ways then one. I just recently had a hard time believing my T(and still am) when she says its ok to e-mail me and its not an annoyance.

I've e-mailed twice in the past 2 days....Hopefully I'll get a reply.

On to more...."serious" things....

I recently told my therapist something no one...almost no one knew. It was about a early age homosexual experience I had. She was SOOOOOOOOOOOO supportive and said it was totally ok, I was young and everyone is confused at some point, she always said its always ok as long as you feel connected to someone....

This event still traumatizes me....its a scar....because at a young age of 10-12 I was scard once I found out the deed I had done . The media doesn't seem to except ppl...like this. Though I'm not full blown Homosexual not even close in fact...
I'm at most bi-curious...even during this experience i had female fantasys while doing it......if I can remember correctly =(.

Right now I'm now suicidal...but not in a way to act upon it..I jsut feel lifeless and tired...not wantingto go on...maybe suicide is to much of a term...maybe I just feel lost....

How do I remember that my T is always there and that I'm not a bother....Thursday..is my next appointmnet it seems so ofar away........