Yeah, I just get angry at the possibility of having boyfriends so I try and isolate myself as much as I can just in case someone takes a fancy to me I dont even know why I am worried about it I honestly dont see a boy or anyone ever taking a fancy to me so I dont know why I am so paranoid. I also do it because I don't want to deal with the hurt of people finding out who I really am and leaving me and then hurting me when I tried to help them. It happens all the time and literally all my relationships always end up with them breaking my trust or I break there trust they break me and then leave. Then I am left hurt and angry at all those who broke my trust then I feel like I am better off alone and I also do it to hurt and spite others by being in my loneliness