I think it is common to receive gifts that aren't necessarily what you like or want. I am fairly particular in what I like, wear, and want in my home as well. When I was in my early 20's and still lived with my aunt (which was "at home," since I didn't ever live with parents), I would always ask for gift certificates, because she never remembered my sizes, my tastes are pretty particular, and I usually wanted something kind of expensive. I figured if she got me a gift card to, say, a larger store then I could put it toward the bigger thing I wanted. And the rest of my family doesn't have a lot of money, so they tend to buy little trinkets which aren't terribly personal, because they don't really know me well anymore. In my opinion, it would be better for them to just send me a nice box of chocolates or nuts because who doesn't like that stuff? And it's inexpensive. But they don't.

I also find myself giving things away, because I don't want it to pile up. It used to bother me, but I have come to the realization that the way they give gifts is never going to change. I'm a pretty good gift giver; it's the way I show affection to people, I enjoy understanding them and what they want, and I think I do it well. That's not how everyone works, and unfortunately there isn't anything to do about it but say, "Thank you," and let that be that. I understand the disappointment, but sometimes you just have to accept that people are going to be the way they are. If it truly bothers you more than you can bear, maybe not celebrating a few holidays with them would be a good idea.