Ok I'm not sure but this might be triggering for some, so if you're as trigger happy as I am right now, please don't read....I'd hate to hurt anyone

Well I went to the dentist yesterday. This is not my normal dentist, this is an oral surgeon that I was referred to by my dentist, with high regard, as a matter of fact. Anyway, my husband and I go for my consultation. When we get there, the dentist comes in and he's a young man and he seems really nice and I was starting to get somewhat comfortable with him and he asks me if I'm on any medication. Which I know they have to do.So I told him Prozac and Xanax. Then he asked me if I liked the Xanax, how much I took, if it helped, did I sleep well, etc. etc. on and on. I really hate this because it is very personal and has NOTHING to do with my oral health, so I figure as long as he knows dosages, that should be enough. Then he proceeds to tell me that he just started taking Xanax, and that's why he was asking me and telling me about his life. He was having a hard time and then trouble sleeping and would wake at 3 am and not be able to go back to sleep and other personal things and I was feeling kinda ackward at this point and I could see my husband raise his eyebrows like what the heck is going on. So then we were just discussing the general anesthesia. This is one of the first things he did proceeding the questions of medication and I swear the total of 10 minutes we were in consult with him he said you'll be sedated and "You won't remember anything" about 17 or 18 times. Like every other sentence, you won't remember anything and well to be honest, that was VERY triggering for me because of a history of s.a. and I cannot stand to not be in control of my mental processes. This is why I do not drink and do not do street drugs and waited so long for depression and anxiety meds because of my fear of losing some semblence of control over my body. (happened before in the past) so anyway maybe it's just me but I was very very upset when I left. Because this is someone who was not very professional and is going to have complete control over me because I will be under general anesthesia. He also told me that he would be there and then another oral surgeon will remove the teeth on the other side. There will be no female assistant in there (at my dentist's office there is ALWAYS a female assistant in there) and that I cannot have anybody in the room. Well, so I'm going to call and ask Administration if my husband or my sister (whoever goes with me to drive me home) can be in the room. I have bad panic attacks and the anxiety over this is through the roof and then there's a part of me that thinks I'm just being stupid and I am too ugly for someone to take advantage of me. NOT THAT I WANT THAT AT ALL. But my mind says don't be stupid no one would do that but my gut is telling me something isn't right. Maybe its paranoia, but I want some feedback.

Am I just being a silly goose about this because I am so "trigger happy" these days. It's been rough lately and I've been a stinker about things, I know, but I'm trying to be better

Take Care all and I would appreciate all your feedback on this!

(((hugs)))
Kimberly.