Hello ThinkofANameQuick! The Skeezyks welcomes you to PsychCentral! I hope you find the time you spend here to be of benefit.

I don't know... perhaps it's my age... but this sounds to me like youth... Much of what you wrote reminds me of myself many years ago. There was a time, way back then, when I also dreamt of being a writer. And I also always would get excited by a new idea. But when I tried to actually put it on paper it always seemed just dumb & I soon tired of it & moved on to something else.

Of course, it's possible you're experiencing the effects of some depression & / or anxiety. Are there other difficulties in your life that are bothering you? If your school has a counseling service it might be worth talking with someone there. If not, is there perhaps a trusted teacher you could talk to? The thing is that having these kinds of concerns continue to "rumble around" through your thoughts may only make them seem gradually worse. Having the opportunity to talk them through with a supportive person may be the best way to allay your fears & figure out coping strategies. And then, also, keep posting here on PC. It can help too...