So as the title already says. I have learned helplessness and find myself uncapable of initiating to do things that I feel I just can't. It's like this voice inside my head telling me "you can't do it anyway, so why studying/practising, who are you trying to decieve? You're an incapable person and trying to get competent won't work for you." It's basically severe procrastination. I won't have the same problem with any other subject, no matter whether I like it or not, because even though I feel I am an ineffective person I had good experiences with learning/paractising in other subjects. With maths it's the other way round, I always failed. The mixture of not believing in yourself and having actual ecperience of failure is not good. So sick of this. I feel helpless, hopeless.
There's a grading scope from 0-15 points, with 15 being the best score/A+. I need to have one point in that last test, otherwise I'll have to drop out from school. I feel so terrible. I'm so much done. I hate myself and the world.

Sorry if this is lengthy/pointless.