I can speak from both sides of this stone. Quite obviously my mother was mentally ill. It made for a great deal of difficulty and difficulties I have in my own life can be directly attributed to her. So too am I a mentally ill parent. My now adult children seem to be pretty well adjusted but hindsight tells me I must have been difficult and so too their childhood as a result. I think the difference was between my mother's situation and my own is that I seemed to be aware something was wrong with me. That, combined with traumatic memories of my own childhood I think made me a better parent than her. Still, it can't have been easy for my children - especially having a perent whose behaviour they couldn't anticipate.