Quote:
Originally Posted by Luce
Arrrrgh. I am going through an awful work situation. I am with a person who overreacts and catastrophizes pretty much everything, freaks out and does everything differently, then blames me for it going wrong. (she literally blames me - "this happened because YOU told me abc and so now I have to do xyz. I am only doing what YOU told me to do so this is YOUR fault.") Note - she's my boss. She is in charge of her own choices and behavior.
This freaks me out because... it triggers so much stuff. Her overreactions are waaaay over the top. When they happen (5,6,10 times a day) all I can do is freeze, unsure of what to do or say or how to react in a way that won't incur more wrath. When the attacks are personal and she is ranting at me I often now have full blown panic attacks. Today I only had 2 panic attacks which I managed to get under control. Tears I couldn't stop on several occasions.
We had a meeting with the big boss tonight. Everything I brought up she flat out denied. Lied directly in front of the boss, saying she has never said or done the things she has said and done. She cried and said she can't believe I am saying such awful things. She would never do that.
I am powerless. It mirrors an abuser's behavior in so many ways. I froze and was silent then. I freeze and am silent now. I have no power in the face of outright denial. Word against word.
I am struggling. I don't know how to proceed.
|
Hello. This happens in a lot of workplaces. I suggest you write down with time and date and what you were doing at the time -each incident. Documentation is a very good way to defend and protect yourself and your position here. Your boss sounds like a real fruit cake and sooner or later that will become obvious to others as well. In my own work expereince I found good managers/bosses to be far and few between. It was so common that I wondered how this could happen so often. I ahve heard the same thing from other hourly wage workers. It's almost as if those at the top put the worst most incompetent people in charge. Ironically getting more/higher education is what often gets these people in their jobs. They can read from a book but have no working sense with people and work issues on the floor.
Hang in there and know you are one of many workers who expereince this sort of work envrionment. I am hoepful that if you do begin to document what you do every day and what this other person says and does, you will have a tool to make things better.