Where is that line between pushing yourself to fit into the normal world and believing you can achieve anything etc., and accepting your limitations/disabilities and realizing that you might have to take a step back?

I've work in non professional jobs for years, pretty much okay, and started working at a professional, masters level job 7 months ago. I keep pushing, but honestly it is killing me. It's not the work but mostly the social aspect and hiding/managing my DID etc. The presentations are the worst. I get so scared my child part is right up front and then it feels like I'm abusing my child self by putting her under so much stress. I take a benzo but then I just look stoned and I'm robotic and don't connect with anyone. My presentation yesterday was a disaster, maybe not in reality but in how much stress it put me through. I honestly feel like packing my bags and just running away.

The thought of more and more months of this makes me sick. I'm literally in crisis mode today stuck in bed. But then I think I should keep trying, maybe I'll learn, if it doesn't kill me in the meantime? I want to be able to work at this type of job but I am crazy to keep pushing myself?