Hello Twoboystwogirls: I see this is your first post here on PC. So... welcome to PsychCentral... from the Skeezyks! I hope you find the time you spend here to be of benefit.

I'm afraid I don't have a lot to offer here. From my perspective, your daughter is an adult. She has the right to make her own decisions... even wrong ones. As far as your having difficulty listening to her because she's always complaining goes... you are going to have to establish & enforce some boundaries with her. Decide how much of this you are willing to put up with. Tell her what those limits are. Then, if & when she transgresses them, walk away, hang up the phone, etc.

California therapist, Kati Morton, has some videos on her YouTube channel where she talks about establishing boundaries & dealing with difficult people. These might be useful for you to watch. Good luck!