Ugh. Had an argument with my son last night (h was on my side for once so that was good at least) he wanted to go to Phoenix today with his friend, his friend driving (who is 16 and has only had his license a couple of months). H and I both agreed that he could go, as long as they are home by 4pm to avoid friday rush hour in Phoenix which is just plain scary. Son argued and argued about it and of course I got emotional (curse my emotions!! sometimes I think t is so wrong telling me to feel my feelings as they happen because when I let myself do that I get emotional when I don't want to!) But damn it, he is not 18 yet, and I had to put my foot down about it, I said it's not like I'm saying no you can't go at all, you just have to be home by a certain time and he said well you ARE saying no because we can't be home by 4. Apparently his friend can't go until like 11 and it's a good 2 hour drive to where they're wanting to go (a couple of guitar stores up there) so they want more than an hour. Part of his arguing was "I don't understand why you get so emotional about everything." Now how in the hell am I supposed to answer that?! It is just who I am. The thought of them being in that horrible traffic made me picture him as the vulnerable little kid he used to be, and I cried. I don't like saying "no" all the time but damn it, sometimes as a parent I have to!! I even tried to figure out how I could say yes, but he couldn't make that work out with his friend. I'm still the bad guy. But I'm a bad guy keeping my son safe. And that's my job, damn it. And it's because I love him. This parenting a teenager thing is so hard sometimes. Eep, it's late I gotta get to work. thanks for listening couch.

i hope everyone has a good day! see y'all at lunchtime.