Update: the couch, for what it is worth, is an excellent place to think. It's a rare opportunity to be alone but not lonely. I've been thinking sbout my wife's behavior and mine, and unfortunately the more I read and think the more it looks like she has a lot of narcissistic tendencies and I have a ling history of codependent traits. Dang! I didn't want to get involved again with an alcoholic or drug addict and I didn't--except that yes, I did.