Dear T,

I understand you don't want me to use extra energy getting the sequence of events in the right order.

If the sequence of events is not important for you to know me...not important to get you to get closer to the "fire"...(the trauma)

Then it must be important for me. I feel strongly about this.

If I omit a sequence or mix them up....it turns my account into a different story- not mine at all. Even after all these years, I am processing and discovering nuances I had not thought of before. I am even discovering new facts.

I am still processing what happened to me.
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I forgot, I need help knowing what to do to get me out of a flashback when it becomes too much.