Last week during session T & I were going back & forth on some topic I didn't necessarily agree with him on. (OH there's a novel situation) And he looked at me and asked, "Am I pushing you today?" And I nonchalently said, "A little." But what I was thinking deep down was, %#@&#! I can't believe you don't see my point here." Damned if I will show him my vulnerability on this topic, I have my pride after all.

So, I'm laying here wide awake thinking about tomorrow's session and hoping it doesn't turn into a shoving match. I have this fantasy of being able to tell T how and why he is wrong. It's probably what I need to do but when push comes to shove (hahaha) i lose my guts because I'm afraid of losing him... Why, in my mind, does it have to be all or nothing at all?