I'm in therapy for Personality Disorder NOS w/avoidant features, anxiety, depression, etc. I had planned to post this question in the Psychotherapy forum (and might, still), but thought those with avoidant personality disorder or the same dx as mine, might be best able to think this question through more clearly.

My T has asked me more than once, "Why is it that you can journal so much of what you feel after our sessions, but can't talk about those feelings in our appts.?"

My original take on this was that journaling about my feelings seems to make them less intense. I've been in therapy about 8 months and have a fairly secure attachment to my T (though not yet where T wants me to be). I've read almost everything researchers have written in the past 20 years about avoidant attachment, but can't figure out why I can't talk in therapy about the feelings I journal about. I guess it's possible that I'm afraid my T will think my feelings are foolish and don't want to be criticized, but I can read what I journal in later therapy sessions and not feel foolish. It could also be that I don't yet trust my T as much as I think I do.

If any of you have experienced this problem or can imagine my situation, I would be grateful to hear any opinions, thoughts, suggestions anyone can share.