Hi pegasus,

I do understand that. I do however struggle to understand whether or not it is right to spend more time with a friend than with me and we live together. Living together does not mean spending time. Like for example this past weekend she spent with this specific friend and didn't pay me any attention. I don't mind her having friends at all but it is suspicious because there is another friend she has said she missed and I told her to contact him. So she did and they were happy to have made contact. But after that she never tried to ever make conversation with him again. Yesterday he phoned her but she was sleeping and she never even bothered to call back or message him to ask whats up or anything. So I am struggling to understand how she complained for so long she missed him yet does not make effort to see him after so long or even send a message but she is up at night to message this friend she has spent the weekend with. I do believe seeing is believing and my wife says all these wonderful things about how much she loves me and wants to have children but in the mean time she does not invest time into this relationship. Even though she was not home the weekend and basically never spent time with me I was so tired because I stayed up because I was expecting her home and she came the morning hours late. Even though I barely slept I cleaned and I cooked for her. While she was with the friend when I said I can't deal with the pain any longer she told me she will make it up to me yet no efforts from her whatsoever. I am not quite sure if she feels she owes this friend her time so much because this friend buys her things like when going out the friend pays for it. I can't afford to do things for my wife or take her out at the moment because things has been tough and it kills me because now she allows this friend to do all that for her and what can I do for her? Nothing. And I will say this again our relationship only became like this like 3 months ago when we got married and she wanted this ex of hers as a friend. As she says the only ex that ever meant something to her. I am starting to not care what she does because I feel I have vented enough about how hurt I am when she does not invest any of her time in me. I will slowly but surely not want to be with her because one can only go through this for so long. It literally feels like I am not in a relationship anymore, like I'm just there to provide her a place to live and food. I have been through so much with her already, I could have left her so long already but I did not give up on her. But I draw the line of fighting for her when someone else is involved because I can do nothing about that. And I have said that she can have her friendship but the frequency of it really bothers me out of my mind.