My therapist described this to me in a really good way because i feel exactly the same.
She said i am now in control of the illness, not letting it control me. And ive gone 25 years of living one way and knowing how to react and live in a certain way, and now im learning how to cope with stress, love and relationships with all new skills.
She said the hypo or maina feels great but the consequences are so awful and to stay in check by always remembering the bad that came from being manic in the past.

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