I experienced a bit of that when I moved to a totally different country than the one I grew up in. I had always had this dream about a small farm, kids, a nice man and a anonymous job somewhere. And my whole life pointed towards that classical dream of a Norwegian country side girl, I found a nice man, got married... smack, I get divorced, hm, what do I do now, ups I get pregnant...hmm... have to move abroad. It's not really just to buy a farm in this overpopulated country, and accomodation is in any case veeery expensive. Im used to spacious houses and big gardens, but these giant Dutch people seem sto be used to no space to turn around on. The whole farm thing with horses etc is put on ice, for a long time. I don't ahve a clue what and if I can specialize in forensic psychology as planned before. When I don't know what I can do, I can't dream about it. So I try to figure out what I can do, and find dreams accordingly. I can take a lot of courses that I have always dreamed about taking in Norway, like ceramic and painting. I can give my daughter all the options I never had myself here. I can travel to a lot of other countries in Europe within hours. And if everything ends up not good enough anyway, I can always force my boyfriend to move with me to England, and then I can get myself a farm there instead

If you feel that the way are not going where you want it to go, and you lack anything to make up for the lack of direction, then it is difficult to find meaning in life. I think it sounds like you are a bit depressed, and then it is difficult to see the meaning in life in general. You talk about not feeling like starting something that would take you for example five years to finish, because you don't feel like your life is going to last that long... but no matter how short or long your life is, you will need to fill it up with something that makes sense, and that feel sgood. Maybe you shouldn't be focusing on the end product so much, but enjoy the process of getting to the end? University for me is also many years of interesting learning and studying, getting to meet a lot of interesting people, experiencing something new and challenging. It was more than just getting through it and be done, it was a pat of life, and agood part of life. I don't miss it, but I am glad I had quite a lot of it.

Try making yourself daily routines, and stick to them even when you feel bad. Get yup at the same time, eat something healthy, do some exercice on a regular basis. Try to focus on what you feel like doing here and now, not what would be interesting in five years. Maybe it will help?

Charlie