I feel like this too.
Low self-esteem, beating myself up about small things, insecurity, self-hatred.

I don't like it. I see what I do because of my insecurities and I hate it. I just can't seem to stop it at the time.

If I could just hit a pause button and wait 24 hours before reacting, I would be okay.

I'm really sorry you're going through all of this and you feel alone.