Ouch!:
"me working harder to fix the marriage"
I came to pretty much the same conclusion, that my wife and I would succeed in marriage or religious counseling only if I said "yes, so sorry, we'll go back to doing everything your way"--but she wont even entertain the idea that she might have to sit in front of someone and justify her attitudes or behavior or her parenting.
A partnership is where two people not only work together but decide on a course together and then steer together.