Quote:
Originally Posted by Mike91
Hi guys,
I'm with this girl for almost a year now (I'm 25 and she is 27). The other day she told me that she needs to forget about me in order to go back with her ex.
She says that I'm what shw always dreamed about it and that she's not able to leave straight away, but she needs to do that gradually, by stopping seeing each other every day, texting and so forth.
She also said that she wants me to be in her life, no matter what, because after all we've lived together, she will die if I cut all contacts with her.
I find the situation a little bit weird and somewhat dysfunctional. She talks to me like if she MUST go back with her ex. She's even planning how to achieve that, like if it was a project assigned at work.
I don't know what to do and what to think. I'm realy in love with her, so it is difficult for me.
What do you guys suggest?
Thank you!
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You're in love, you say but is it really that you care about her or for other reasons that you can't deal with not being with her? think about it. The fact that she says she needs to get back with her ex to you but wants to keep you on a string anyway kind of says a lot about her. I highly doubt that over the past year that she has shown no signs of being this type of person already or that this is new behavior entirely. For that reason if it's coming as a shock to you, it's probably because you've been in a mode where you're not paying much attention to what is really going on. Rarely do people suddenly change like this but there are almost always signs of it along the way, we just don't pay attention and/or ignore, remain in denial that there is a problem.
Do you really want to hang onto someone that has by no uncertain terms laid out their motivation to manipulate you? She knows you're attached. She likes to think of you as being a safety net, that's all it is. She doesn't care about anyone but herself and her own needs.
Run. Run away, fast.