I think now it has happened enough times that if I say I want a divorce again, everybody will just laugh in my face. I, myself, will not take myself seriously. It's like the anger leaves me after a while and I start to want to take him back and feel really sorry for making a scene and not appreciating him.

I must really be BPD.

At least if I recognize that, maybe I'll just go cry somewhere and things will get batter on their own.

As long as I don't OD, and just stop acting out.

And he definitely does his part. This isn't me alone.

There's so much I never even said here on PC. You wouldn't believe! It's not just me!

The weirdest thing is nobody cares. There are no repercussions. We just go back to normal and everybody acts like nothing happened. Nobody told me to stop carrying on. My husband didn't even lay down the law. How much would he put up with?

Do I have BPD and did everything I can to push him away? This guy refuses to go. There's not another man alive that would put up and still want me. Why does he even want me? That's truly the underlying fear--

I hate to say it, but some men might love B's... When I am sweet and loving to him, he ignores and neglects me. When I throw him out and tell him I want a divorce he vows his love and affection. Hmmmmmm