It's ok! The way you are describing your feelings is exactly how I was when I started this. My counselor talked with me, I believe when he realized what I was dealing with, and told me I would not be the same person that I was then if I chose to work through this.

He was right. I'm not the same person I was. I'm in the process of knowing who I really am. And. I am steadily becoming the person I was created to be.

It has been scary and there have been times that I didn't want to see or actualize what my mind knew was true.

You may already this but I'm 52 years old. I've spent the majority of my life either numb or in some other state of a triggered mess. My heart wishes it had the knowledge and strength to have started this earlier in my life. I do trust His plan and purpose though.

Take heart and know that you are already looking for peace and answers. I pray that you find peace in the fear. Leaning into it sounds like an invitation for fear and hurt. But, it's actually the doorway out.

Truth brings freedom, is what I've found. It may have some distress connected to it, but on the other side the is understanding of who you are.

((( understanding hug )))

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