I don't know what to say, other than the way I call it, you're being hard on yourself.
It's part of thinking that you know everything that goes on inside your head, when you don't.
Nobody really knows. All modern medicine and studies can do is guess.
Give yourself a break. From over analyzing, from thinking beyond.
Leave that stuff for when you're healthy. Entertain that wonderful mind of yours with more mudane things. Vape, listen to pop music, throw a rock see how far it goes. Or what breaks. Something that non supergenius do.