I've been reflecting tonight.

I'm depressed and have started getting paranoid and seeing the expressions of people in pictures changing and contorting. And I'm scared.

I've been seeing things more intensely. Things are more beautiful and everything seems slower. And since things have been more beautiful, I've been wanting to become part of the world around me. Right now I feel trapped in my physical body.

Since when we die our energy is released out into the world around us and we become part of it and will no longer be trapped and suffering and scared, why would you not choose to become part of it? I mean, why? Why would I choose to continue on the way I am when I could choose to be free.