Hey..I'm so sorry that you are stuggling with your marriage. I guess it's time to ask yourself some hard questions. How do you want to be treated in the future by the peon who is supposed to be your partner and friend in life? It sounds like he likes to bully and manipulate you. Do you think either of you can get past the cheating? Some people honestly can't move forward into a place of trust and honesty again. And maybe the hardest question of all...why are you staying? What is left to stay for? I'm getting ready to leave my marriage...I stayed 8 years for my kids. But know I am leaving because of them. What really changed my mind was this...what am I teaching my kids by staying? That if you are unhappy in life then you can't ever change your situation? What am I teaching them about marriage? Do I want my daughter in a bad marriage because she thinks that's normal? If my daughter was in my situation....would I tell her to stay? Why would u want less for urself then u want for your kids?
These are some of the questions I asked myself. I hope it helps you.
Good luck in your journey.