Quote:
Originally Posted by Skeezyks
Hello wizardy: Welcome to PsychCentral... from the Skeezyks!  I hope you find the time you spend here to be of benefit. 
You know... I am where you are a lot of the time. What your brain is telling you is depression talking. And depression can be treated. Personally, I think it would be fine to share how you feel with your girlfriend. But I also think you may well be correct. It may not change anything to a significant degree. What you need is therapy. And if that isn't sufficient, then perhaps antidepressants. (Assuming that these things are available to you where you live.) You mentioned that you attempted suicide once before. Statistically, this makes it more likely that you may try again. (I've done so.) It's important to acknowledge you're ill & to reach out, in real life, for the help you need. But also keep posting here on PC. It can help too!
It is true, I believe, that when one person who struggles with depression becomes involved with someone else who also struggles with depression, the whole situation becomes more complicated. On the other hand, the "up-side" of this is that you can understand & hopefully support one another. It's just important that you both acknowledge your individual struggles & commit to doing what is necessary to succeed as a couple. From what you wrote, it sounds to me as though you & your girlfriend are lucky to have each other. This is a rare gift. Please don't throw it away! I don't know what it was that caused you to attempt suicide to begin with. But you're young, you apparently have a good job, & a wonderful budding relationship. That's a lot to live for & to be celebrated! 
I send healing thoughts your way with the hope that you will be able to find the strength to overcome...   |
Hello,
thanks for your reply, it really helped me that somebody actualy put effort in reading and thinking about it.
Yes, I do agree with you and I know I have problem so Iv made an appointment and hope it will help me somehow. Iv suggested to my GF this some time ago but she is scared about what people would think about her. That difference betwean us. She is "sad" because of society harming her and making her feel this way and and her childhood, which left scars on her soul. Im because of my brain telling me this. I dont personally care what others think about me, if its not person who is important to me. Writing here helped me because now I dont feel like Im totaly alone in it. It does but it helps me to focus on somebody else and dedicate my life and effort to her so at least she can be happy. It sounds pretty selfish but it help us both. I would never want to leave her and let her alone but those deamons in my head are such a pain in.... lower back.
In some point of my life Iv lost everything which kept me going on and fight. There was nothing to live for anymore so I wanted to end it up. I couldnt and when I saw how much it hurt my family Iv decieded to not do it anymore so now I cant kill myself even if I wanted it really much. I cant do it to them. I always knew before it, that there is way out (death) and I can quit anytime I want, now this road is closed (suicide one) for me. I will see what specialist will tell me next week.
Thank you again, I will keep fighting for her and me too.