Hello Sethen132: I see this is your first post here on PC. So... welcome to PsychCentral... from the Skeezyks! I hope you find the time you spend here to be of benefit.

You don't mention, in your post, whether or not you're seeing a therapist or psychiatrist. I take it you are since you list several diagnoses. Really... this is the first step for you... that & dealing with your substance abuse which may require you to become involved in some sort of substance abuse rehab program.

I've struggled with anxiety for many years & I know it can cause all sorts of strange & disturbing sensations. No, you're not completely insane. You have some serious anxiety & substance abuse issues, & maybe a few other mental health concerns. But that doesn't make you insane. From my perspective, the fact that you are aware of the struggles you're having, & you want to heal, means there's more right with you than there is wrong with you.

However, you do need to accept the fact that you are the captain of your ship, so to speak. Although you're only 17, you're still going to have to be the one to decide that you are going heal & do what is necessary to make it happen. That's simply the way life is. Hopefully you have the support of your family. And there are mental health professionals & programs that can treat you. But, you still must make the commitment to heal. Being here on PC can help too. So please keep posting!