Quote:
Originally Posted by cakeladie
I agree with everyone. If you two are a couple then it's both of your money.
My first husband took everything when he left. He drained out our accounts and maxed out our cards. I was left with our autism son and no money.
He was always one to spend spend spend and I thought if we worked over time and did not need it for bills it should be saved when that got to a certain amount I made an account in my sons name so when I ex left and he thought he left me with nothing I had that money. Then I closed our joint accounts and opened up accounts in my own name.
My second husband likes to spend but over the years and now he does save and asks me if I need money for anything since I can no longer work but I also have my own account and my name is on our joint account
It's a controlling mechanism. If you are to sick to work can u get SSDI ? Or look for a part time job? Maybe pet sitting?
But please never leave your purse alone and you might not want to leave it alone with him either.
Good luck
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I'm sorry to hear about your first husband. What a monster! I'm so glad that you were able to take control of your finances again! It sounds like you're doing better now-
It is a controlling mechanism! I'm not to sick to work, but I do have mental problems that get in the way of being able to keep a job for long. I suspect that most of the places have fired me for not being social.
Of course, I was forced to quit a few jobs to since the work environment became to hostile for me to bear. Most back then even involved sexual harassment by one or more men. I even went to H.R to complain about them, but nothing was done except for the fact that they were given a talk to. I was younger and thinner then, but I never dressed provocatively or flirted, so that made no sense to me. That made me so angry! I was married at the time too! WTH?
A lot of the women seem to not like me much, or at the very least, ignore me for whatever reason. I was only able to make friends with a few women around my age who weren't superiors at work in the past. I hate that pecking order at work and having to be social when you're not that way.
I'll look for work soon. I'll go to that free counseling place and hopefully they can take me in. And hopefully they can help me out too. I'll be different this time. Now that I'm older and fat, I doubt that any man will even glance twice at me. Not that I want them to of course! This time I'll try to make more of an effort to be friendly, but I'll keep my distance professionally of course. And of course I'll have to be nice to the boss no matter what, at least on the surface. As long as they don't get out of line with me, I'll have to be fake nice, ugh!