Hi everyone i know the things and consequences that lies being anorexia because i feel the same way when looking at the mirror looking fat but actually everybody says im thin. But I just coudn't help it. I easily get emotionally down or upset when I gain weight now my face looks fat... I envy those girls who are thin. Got obssessed for it because it will look great on me when i do fashion. I have fat legs and thats just what keeps me to go thin. I also wanted my jeans to fit on me and being fat made me anxious and insecure if i compare myself to other thin girls. Im a nursing graduate 21 y.o. 5'4" tall weight 50kg who is reviewing for the board exam but im having a sideline job that will help me to get rid of my weight like call centers working on a graveyard shift. I take pills, go to the gym mondays to saturdays. I deprive my self from eating and it made me very sick and so i take pills to supress eating knowing the side effects until i abuse myself doing excessive exercising and working. Everyone was shock for being thin so fast and so some of them ask me wether im anorexic and that i look sick and maybe i am. You see being thin makes me feel confident and superior but i have a stress ulcer and has abnormal heart rate. I now 45kg. I cant stop my self doing these things. It's painful and fatigue. I just hated myself. I can't talk to anyone about it because they were expecting a lot from me. I think I needed help. But I want to get thin. Am having emotional problems right now... I feel hopeless.