I had a manic episode just yesterday and felt exactly the same way! This will pass. Just like a terrible storm that can't be controlled, you just have to hang in there until it passes. All day yesterday my mantra was telling myself that I am stronger than my illness, over and over and over again. I didn't even believe what I was saying but I held on. You can do this! I hate that you're feeling this way because I know that pain all too well! We're here for you!