For me it was such a relief to the battling, warring life I was living. I had purchased a farm with the inheritance money & sale of her house after my Mom died. It was 2100 miles away & I went there to close on the farm & work on fixing up the house. I was gone all summer & realized that I didn't miss him one little bit & he never communicated during those months & because I was feeling so much peace not having anything to do with him....I never bothered communicating with him either.

I did give him a chance to see if a different environment would make a difference in him like it had made in me that following end of December & first week in January. I ended up kicking him out & sent him back to the home we had & I continued to stay at my farm.

I wondered why that relationship was so strange all those years & why there never had been a connection or what I felt should be normal communication & wondered why I was fighting everything about him for all those years.

Leaving was such a peaceful relief to me that I never had a sad feeling about it. I wondered why he wouldn't change to make the marriage work. I came to understand why several years after leaving when I started to research the behaviors that I had been living with all those years. What a relief that knowledge was as it helped relieve the hate that had built up over all the bad years of marriage.