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Marylin · Jun 14, 2016, 12:23 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Ceara1010

Hi Marilyn, I'm relatively new to this forum.

I know firsthand what this kind of thing can do to you because, for over ten years, I've had a stalker that breaks into my house and does stuff like move things and set my kitchen timers to go off at 2am.

Possible trigger:

Like many women, I have my home decorated with knick-knacks that are all placed very particularly around the rooms, and he likes moving them out of place. Most recently, he broke in and moved a decorative apple I have on my living room fireplace mantle about a foot to the left of where it was normally positioned. (There's only four items on my mantle and they are arranged in a specific manner, and have been for nine years, so there's no way I moved it and left it there and just forgot about it.)

Another favorite thing for him to do is move books around on my shelves as I have them shelved strictly according to genre--he'll move books to the wrong genre shelf.

(I'm somewhat compulsive about my things, so there's no way I moved any of this stuff, and just didn't put it back.)

One day, I went in and out several times throughout the day, and every time I came home, I found my phone (landline) had been turned around 180 degrees backwards, so that the front of the phone’s base faced the wall behind it. As soon as I noticed the phone had been turned around the wrong way, I turned it back again. But later would come home to find the phone turned around to face backwards yet again. This happened four times that day. (There's no way I did this and forgot--why would I turn my phone around to face the wall? For fun?)

And sometimes he does other things besides move stuff, such as stealing a doll my sister gave me, and setting kitchen timers on my fridge to go off at 2am (it's always 2am).

Once, he ripped out the first page of a little spiral notebook I had where I logged all my online account passwords and usernames. I kept this notebook next to my computer as I used it every day, so I quickly noticed when the page went missing.

I've also suspected he hacked my computer as I've found files deleted, or altered in such a way that can only be done with software--for example, I've found a favorite mp3 had been significantly edited and not by me as I've never edited a music file before.

Historically, this seems to mostly happen just a few times a year, unless he’s also been breaking in without moving anything--I only know if he's been there if he's moved something. But I haven’t figured out a specific pattern as to when he's going to do this.

He clearly watches my house, waiting for me to leave, as I am sure he's never broken in when I'm home.

I think I know who is doing this, but I have no way of proving it yet, and I could be wrong. I live alone and have no children who visit me who might move things as a prank. It is definitely not a family member as I changed the locks as soon as this began to happen in my condo, and they didn't have keys. Besides, in the ten years I've had my condo, I've had visitors only a few times, and then only immediate family, and we always gather in the same room. And I’m sure they would not move my things around, and if for some weird reason they did, they certainly would put whatever they moved back like it was.

This is indeed gas lighting and it caused me to have my breakdown. Because of this, I am currently living with my parents, but check frequently at my condo and continue to find things moved out of place.

Unfortunately, thinking one is being stalked is a common sign of schizophrenia, so my PTSD was initially misdiagnosed by people who didn't interview me even once. But eventually, after a T got to know me over time, she saw I'm very rational, and also that I'm not the type to make things up to get attention. Now she finally believes me. My sister does now, too, and so does my Pdoc.

I'm only going to catch this person if I get a home security system with video, and I don't have the money for it. Unfortunately, my father does not believe the stalking is really happening, or take it seriously, so I don't think he would pay for this.

Anyway, that's my gas lighting story. I know what it does to you. So hang in there and don't let your sister make you crazy.

--Ceara1010

Hi Ceara,
I really feel for you I know how much shock and horror you must feel having someone without permission enter your home.Do you know who this man is,were you involved with him in the past?
Can you afford a simple burglar alarm which would go off every time he enters.Then you can report to police.

You and I both know how scary and disorientating having someone do this gaslighting is!Then there is the added injury if people don't believe you.I have reported my sister to the police,they will be round to my home tomorrow evening to take a report,I hope they will act against my sister or warn her off,I don't know if they will react different when they find out about my mental illness,that is the trouble.I am praying to God the police question her ,catch her out so she admits it,I can't prove she did it see.

At least by reporting it I am doing all I can to support myself and even if the police just pay her a visit and question her it will frighten her out of trying anything else.I am so tired off her,I cut her out of my life 1 1/2 years ago,I want to forget about her,but she is determined to kill me still.