Hello AlwaysChanging,

sounds hard to risc being fired just to be you :/

I don't think you see a delusion, just noticing that what you learned you should look like doesn't match your appereance.
For me being genderqueer was strange at first. It seemed like "breast are female, no breasts are male" - sooooo...? What's left?

What helped me was realising that my body is not female. It is my body and I am not female, so per definition my body is neither (or at least this logic helps me to believe it).
At the same times I also experience gender dysphoria. I miss my beard when I look into the mirror. It's just so odd to not see one!

Maybe it's okay to own your body (and see it as alining to your gender) and still missing things on it (or having to much).
Maybe we should just allow us to define us ourself.

Wish you luck on your journey!