I don't think everyone will be better without you. I want to believe there is one person in this world that would sad or hurt if they knew you didn't exist tomorrow.

You're allowed to be in pain. Just because no one can see it or you can't describe it doesn't mean that it isn't real to you. I wish you had supportive people in your life and maybe one day you will be able to surround yourself with people who care.

Maybe learning some more coping skills will help you not be in so much pain. Getting better takes work, a lot of work. It feels like an impossible task when you don't even want to wake up let alone try to deal with painful talks and changing how you deal with thoughts and feelings.

I work in things one chunk at a time. I don't ever feel like I was or will get to a point t where I am "fixed" but life isn't always suffering for me anymore. I do have genuine happy moments between all of the darkness of mental illness.