Wow - some very good points mentioned here!

I have experiences that support both sides of the discussion here (and actually, I believe that almost everyone is ultimately on the same side in this thread anyway).

I was living abroad a few years ago when the gay marriage issue was under debate. Many non-Americans that I met wanted to know what the "typical" American thinks about the issue. I rolled my eyes and said that I didn't understand why the media was even making it an issue. I could count the number of bigots I knew on one hand. To my utter shock, the opinion polls began being published and I found out that I was well into the minority about how Americans feel about sexuality. I realized that I have always lived in very liberal bubbles (New York, Philadelphia, San Francisco, Portland) where the stigma is minimized. I didn't realize how strong the 'red' contingent is. I was very hurt and ashamed of my countrymen to learn that gay marriage is frowned upon by the majority.

At the same time, even in my liberal social circles, I learned that unless you're publicly gay or bi, the stigma is not obvious, but indeed it's still there. My hope is that the stigma is disappearing, but I believe that only those who are stigmatized can really say that for sure.

About the promoting, I agree with that as well. Why is it ok to pronounce homosexuality as something to be proud of, yet it would sound oppressive to say the same about heterosexuality? Same with black vs white. But I think that while it constitutes a double-standard, I do think that those who experienced oppression have some right to overcompensate... for a while. Not forever, but for a while it seems fair.

Peace to all