Hi, I am diagnosed with BPD and Anxiety, and it's currently a pain in the ***.
I have this thing where I feel like I'm being watched on a constant basis. I know that I'm not, but it still feels like I am. And I can't shake the feelings. Usually it doesn't bother me, I get on with my day and it doesn't stop me from doing anything.
Now this might sounds stupid, but I want to start dancing - I used to love it as a child and I did gymnastics too, I was fairly good. But in the last 10 years (I'm 18) I haven't set foot in front of a mirror other than to do my make up. And I so badly want to dance and do dance covers to songs and stuff, but I am absolutely terrified and paranoid that I'm being watched (even though I know I'm not), the crippling fear of looking stupid is preventing me from doing something.
I've got anxiety meds (Propanalol) but it doesn't work for thoughts, only for physical symptoms.
What should I do? I don't have a doctor to see or anything.
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"That's the thing about anxiety - it limits your experiences so the only stories you have to tell are the 'I went mad' ones."
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