Hi...I'm glad you understand me...because I surely as hell (are curse words allowed...?...the former secular nun now cursing--on rare occasions--and it feels good) don't.
In some ways I'm at least trying to circle. From my earliest memories to about two years ago, I had a very strong belief in "God" and the after-life. Was always in the role of listener and encourager. In fact, I was known to say to everyone, "Look up and look within". I said it from a strong spiritual perspective.
What strengthened my belief was that in the midst of the tragic things which happened in my life (from suicide of others to car crash in which I was in the passenger searand the heart of my family driving and killed...I could go on and on), there were these "whispers", sometimes loud messages in my "spirit", from The Other Side, we shall say, "telling" me that I was loved unconditionally and that "He" would carry through these more than arduous events, carry me in the "shadow of his wings".
Then about two years ago, something changed in me. I started to look at all those people experiencing what we would call heinous events. For example, the beheadings and the burning of the Jordanian pilot. Where was "God"? I then started to really doubt that the "messages in the spirit" I had received were indeed from The Other Side. I mean, why would "God" carry me through these arduous events, even rescue me as I had thought from some of them, and yet seemingly ignore the sufferings of so many? It was then that I seriously wondered if these "messages"/kisses on the cheek from The Other Side were just nothing more than coincidences...we are really toast if "God" plays favorites or only responds to the "right" kind of religious prayer.
I want very much to hear your story. Like you, I don't relay certain details often...most people wouldn't believe them anyway.
I have never called anyone a liar.
I looked at your profile...I see that you, too, are in TN. Would you like me to PM my email address to you...?....I'd really like to do so. I have to laugh...even my email address has "spiritual" meaning. Chosen years ago when I was the secular nun, of course.
Thank you,
Annie
Quote:
Originally Posted by Crypts_Of_The_Mind
See - the thing is, I came full circle (in some ways) on my beliefs. I was taught them at a young age, dismissed them at age 12, went through many others and landed on a slightly altered variation of the one I was taught based upon an experience I had (not near death) that proved to me what was real and what was not. I still only tell the details of that experience to those who want to know because I have found doing so otherwise emits anger, I also do not require someone believe what i say just that they do not call me a liar. However like I said that is how I got mt questioning answered and whybI understand you.
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