my latest breakdown was a very bad thing...I was disabled for almost 4 years...I was on social security disability....I never wanted anybody to know that I was getting money from my government....I knew what they would say...I had to leave practice....I couldn't do it...I still struggle with some guilt...that maybe I should have tried harder...but I just didn't want to be responsible for anybody...anymore....people don't like when you are not working...