It sounds to me like he is "conditioning" you. He is making you realize he is in control of you and your children and you are limited on what you say to him or others. In effect, he is isolating you by making sure he will appear to be "the perfect guy" to everyone around you so if you ever do choose to say anything you will get a response similar to "well what did you do to him first?" or "yea, right - he'd never do that - why are you saying such things?" He is also at the same time introducing you to feeling powerless so you will think it is just you as time continues. Also - he is causing you to question your emotions and reactions to look for "blame" in yourself rather than him. This is all conditioning for an abusive partner. I would highly recommend to stop the relationship before it goes further. I have been in many abusive relationships - it is not something you want or need especially witg you having children. Don't worry about offending him - just make up some reason to end things and leave.

If you have doubts that it is an abusive or controlling relationship - here are two links to analyze it out:

(to look just for controlling relationship)
https://www.psychologytoday.com/blog...is-controlling

(to look for abuse signs)
Domestic Violence and Abuse: Signs of Abuse and Abusive Relationships

Just be careful
*hugs*