I'm trying to answer this post honestly, so here goes.

I have SI'd a number of times this past year, particularly since my son has been sick.
It is a way of releasing deep emotion that I can't seem to touch otherwise.

I have not SI'd in a couple of months. However, I still have very, very strong urges like right now. Last week I called T because I remembered the face of a man who tried to rape me many many years ago. I wanted to cut, but I called T instead. When I was speaking to him I told him I had the urges to cut but didn't. Because I am middle aged, I felt embarrassed to discuss this with him. I told him I was ashamed because developmentally, the coping mechanism is inappropriate. He understood me.

So, I guess what I'm saying is I have not been SI'ing either because of my relationship with T is growing deeper and more loving.

I hope you can continue to internalize the love, and I will try too!

Let's take gentle care and be good to ourselves, ok?