Quote:
Originally Posted by lolagrace
Okay, please don't take this the wrong way; I say it affectionately, but this response sounds like the response of a small child -- like it comes from a very young place. All the "why's". Remember that phase your kids went through -- wanting it their way, not wanting change, and a bit petulantly stomping their feet and saying "that's not fair! I hate you!" I really, really don't mean that as an insult, but since you do that kind of work in therapy, perhaps your adult Rainbow needs to sit down and talk to this young, angry Rainbow. Maybe the adult Rainbow needs to run the show on this one? Just throwing that out there for your consideration. Toss it away if I'm way off base and I very well might be.
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I appreciate all the replies and will answer each separately this time.
lola: I'm smiling because your responses are usually accurate even when I don't like them. I realize there is an angry child part, as well as one who is hurt. You're not off base at all. But there is also a part who doesn't understand the reasoning behind the necessity to stop the emailing. That part honestly believes it's okay to have that kind of relationship with my T. The younger parts WANT it and are protesting, but the older part says "why not?" in a curious way. Probably my adult Self does know it's best to pull away from my T, but she's not ready to disregard the other parts. But, yes. the child part is still very attached to T. At my last session, we had to stop and I said in that whiny voice "It's not fair! We started 3 minutes late." Which was true but the next client was waiting. So T repeated "it's not fair" and I kept talking on the way to the door. Life isn't fair. My adult Self knows that, and knows maybe my T is right. If something happened to her now, I'd be stuck with wanting those emails. But what about real life? We don't have to deal with tragedy until it comes. We don't stop communicating with someone or loving them because they might die. I don't understand why therapy is different.