sister and pinksoil, I agree. That really stuck out to me from your post, sister, as just so true. I am in my 40s. Cutting would be totally embarrassing for me now (although I realize it was metaphorical, I felt ashamed about the fantasy I had of cutting and spilling my blood on the carpet in T's office while he watched). When I was a teen, it did seem much more developmentally appropriate. Someone asked me a long time ago how I stopped cutting, and I answered, "I outgrew it." Now, in middle age, I need different coping mechanisms. (I don't always have them, but I know I need them!)