Few people who haven't been there really understand suicidality. When I'm suicidal, it's because I feel like the pain will never end and I want to kill myself to make it stop. I want out of the trap that is my life. It has nothing to do with selfishness and everything to do with not knowing how to help myself.

That said, I don't bother telling friends or family members anymore. It just freaks them out and they don't know what to say or do. I save it for my tdoc or pdoc or if I'm feeling really desperate and they are not available, I call a suicide hotline to talk things out.