I do try to stay in the present, but even if I do that I just feel like I failure. My present basically consists of watching netflix which isn't exactly much of a life. And I am trying to improve things, and taking steps to change but that in itself is overwhelming. If I don't meet others or even my own expectations of what I should have achieved it just adds to the feeling of self hatred and that I am useless/worthless/a failure etc etc

It seems impossible to get some kind of balance where I can feel like I'm moving forwards without putting so much pressure on myself to succeed