I think I've been confusing love with gratitude. I've been questioning and reviewing some feelings, and considering that my memory is mostly good, I think I haven't been feeling certain emotions when I think I should (at least towards my parents). I've realized that even as a toddler, it wasn't the time with them that I liked, but what they presented. I like my friends just fine, but my parents? Despite being with them for most of my life so far, paying attention to their personality, talking to them, and experiencing things with them, I guess I like what they do and did, and I'm feeling pretty crappy about it as a result. I'm not shallow, since I like my friends for their personalities, but it's a little hard to put into words how I really feel about my parents.