It's not a judgment, it's a fact that there's a difference between having AvPD and having avoidant traits. If you just have traits, luckily you won't have all the personality disorder symptoms, which is a separate list that people overlook. It's simply a different experience.

Look at it like a disease like diabetes. If you have pre-diabetes you have to do a lot of similar self care as people with diabetes, like watching your diet and getting regular checkups, but it's not as extreme as having full blown diabetes. And definitely if you are pre-diabetic you can learn a lot from people with diabetes, and people with diabetes can learn from pre-diabetics.