If he was good for nothing, it would've been easy to leave.

I didn't talk to the friend with the pot, and you are right. I'm glad I didn't do it.

I tried to cope with this in a better way, but I just can't. I was self destructive once again, because he presses my buttons. He won't let up. He triggers me.

I said horrible things to him. Unforgivable things that you can't take back. I thought that would be the end.

But this morning he tries to make peace and still wants to stay together. I told him I don't have any respect for him for still wanting me after what I said.

I spent the day with my mother. We're all numb from all this back and forth drama that's been going on with me for the whole marriage.

Everyone, m family, my friends, agree that I do not have a MI. It's my relationship with him that is just bad and incompatible, and has driven me crazy.

I guess I should be posting in the Abuse section. That's what this is. It's an abusive, toxic relationship. . I am so sorry.